Yesterday, while most people were celebrating
their freedom in the US, I repotted some begonias and I rearranged my bedroom (which is actually in
what should be the front room on my duplex) and my office because I was
recently gifted an elliptical machine and it was either rearrange my
room or figure out how to move it to the basement, and I know if it’s in the
basement, I will never use. I also have a couple of houseguests coming tomorrow
for the night from Nashville so it seemed like also a good day to go to the
market, take all the curtains down and wash them, and give the pack of dogs a
bath (though I didn’t get to that chore).
I also binge watched the latest season of Shameless, because listening to British accents while deep cleaning
a floor is somehow strangely comforting to me. This is also how I will spend most of my
Sunday--cleaning and organizing my house. I actually like cleaning now that I
am older. Which is odd, since I hated cleaning as a child.
After, I found a stopping place; I colored my hair to hide those grays
that my sweetest only child is causing more of everyday. I hear this is a common
problem of mothers of children.
And then I headed down to my favorite dive bar, Kirby’s Beer Store, to
see some friends play and to celebrate birthdays of two of my dearest.
While, driving there, I saw many illegal fireworks, shooting high in the
sky and sang songs that I won’t admit publicly that I know the words too.
The bar was full of old friends. I missed the first band, but
caught Deathblack Flowers. After their set, I went outside to talk to
two of my friends, but was caught on the way to their table by a man I didn’t
know who was trying to spark my interest in him by showing me videos of his
homemade fireworks. When he asked if I
wanted to see it I replied that fireworks are bad for the environment and
overrated and they scare my dog. I’m not a fan. He showed me the video anyway,
and I felt trapped to watch it all.
I finally slipped away to find my friends, and was glad he didn’t ask for
my phone number after his amazing show of masucailty, to find them being
chatted up by a much a younger man. I
sat down and he did the polite thing by asking my name and then not pronouncing
it correctly over and over again. It was bad. He then asked me what I was
‘into, which felt like my answer would either allow me to keep his attention or
divert it away. He also really liked my bangs and thought I was 27. It was all
so very annoying and laughable. But, the best part was once he figured out I,
and my two friends, were older than he thought (thank goodness for the dark and
bad lighting) he told us we should all get into youth culture and Hip Hop.
Because those of us over a certain age now know nothing about what is cool
anymore, and of course, that also means knowing nothing about Hip Hop. Hip Hop being the music I grew up on. The music
I play to awaken my sleeping beast of a child on Sundays mornings. I walked
away shaking my head and asking myself if at 21 did I actually fall for that
sort of bullshit? Remembering that yes, once I did, and thankfully I did not
anymore.
When I went back inside, my friend Les’ band, World Palestine was setting
up and who do I see is in the band now--Davy. Davy and my son were close friends in elementary
school before they both changed schools. Davy--this sweet kid who I have
watched grow up to be quite an accomplished musician, but for the first time
ever, I felt too old to be in my favorite bar. My own son will be 21 soon. Is
it time to give up the town and the music to him? Probably. This is also one of the reasons I want to
relocate. Wichita is a huge town without enough space. I also know quite a lot
of people, and my son is often overwhelmed and doesn’t feel like he can escape
my reputation and create his own identity. I can thank his therapist for that
insight. As if parenting wasn't hard enough....
The night ended with me becoming an ordained minister for the Universal Life
Church. I was chatting with my friend Eric about his upcoming wedding to my
dear friend Mary, and he joked that the wedding was private but if I wanted to
marry them I could attend. So, I pulled out my phone and within five minutes, I
was ordained. Now I can marry people legally. I'm offering a special to celebrate my ordination.
Afterwards, I came home and ate cheese and crackers and ice cream in bed
with my dogs.
It really isn't as sad as it sounds. The dogs don't care for ice cream so I got to eat it all by myself.
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